The parent-child relationship and its role in achieving sports performance

Children's sports performance depends on the parents' personal development

The speed with which technological and social changes are occurring, currently impacts children and young people, from a psychological point of view. They come in contact with stimuli much more varied and intense than those with which their parents met, at the same age (smartphones, tablets, computer games, television programs, more busy streets, crowds, different school programs). etc.). The social context is also different. On the other hand, neither parent is bypassed by the current accelerated changes. In these conditions, in order to support the optimal development of the children, it is necessary for the parents to go through their own personal development process.

In the case of children and young sportsmen, things become even more complex. During training, but especially during competitions, they experience increased levels of stress. The same is true in the context of school activities and examinations.

Psychic mechanisms involved in sports performance

Under these conditions, depending on the individual characteristics and the way they are sustained, the psychic mechanisms of children and young sportsmen may work in their favor or to their detriment. Here are some examples:

•     mainly positive or negative thoughts;
•     self-criticism or self-encouragement;
•     easy or difficult updating of technical-tactical information;
•     visualization (imagining) of success or failure;
•     excessive, balanced or suppressed emotions;
•     internal conflicts that may arise in the context of the choices they need to make: training vs. meetings with friends and / or other social events;
•     over-motivation, under-motivation or optimal motivation;
•     higher or lower level of attention in relation to a set of parameters - concentration, distributivity, stability, mobility, volume);
•     mobilization to a greater or lesser extent of physical and mental resources, in order to achieve the objectives.

The development of sports performance (but not only), up to the level of excellence, is based on the efficient functioning of the mechanisms previously exemplified (thinking, memory, imagination, affectivity, motivation, attention, will) and on a series of more complex psychic constructs. The development of a positive self-image is an essential element of success, as are the development of autonomy, adaptability and an optimal lifestyle (in accordance with age). At the same time, character development plays a crucial role, the way it is built, often depending on the sustainability of the sports career.

How can you support the performance of children and young sportsmen as parents?

Allocate time

The main step you need to take, as parents of children and young sportsmen, (but not only) is to devote special time to developing trust-based relationships with them. Being close to them in important moments, accepting their emotions and behavioral manifestations generated by them, avoiding judging them for what they did or did not, respond to the emotional support needs of children and young sportsmen.

Demonstrate emotional readiness without intervening

Many parents find it difficult to attend the emotional manifestations of children and young people, especially when they cry. The mere presence and affirmation of the parents' emotional availability are sufficient. Any explanations about what should or should not feel, think or do are useless. They do even more harm than good in the long-term development process. Emotional support is sufficient in most cases. As in the case of adult athletes, to the extent that they feel the need, the release of emotional tensions accumulated by children and young people during competitions contributes to their re-balancing.

Communicate constructively

One of the main goals of constructive communication is the development of a language oriented to what works, which will stimulate performance. An important element of this is the systematic orientation of the attention towards the useful aspects of the experiences that children and young sportsmen experience. We recommend that you practice constructive communication both in relation to others and to your own person.

Stimulate the development of healthy habits

Mental hygiene, nutrition and rest, together with movement, are the basic pillars of an optimal lifestyle that supports long-term growth. Developing healthy lifestyle habits for children and young sportspeople is much easier when parents represent patterns of behavior. Therefore, in order to positively influence children and young people, it is necessary to pay attention to their own lifestyle from the perspective of the factors mentioned above. To these are added: the social support network (family members, friends other significant people on which children and young people can rely and who can rely on them), personal development continues, manifestation of hobbies / passions.

Personal development for parents

As children and young sportsmen grow older, the need for physical, mental and social support changes. In order to be able to provide this support in the most appropriate ways, parents need to show openness and adaptability, and many of them need to follow a true personal development plan.

The psychological training programs for children and young sportsmen that I organize include, in addition to the individual and group training sessions with the athletes, joint sessions with the children / young people and parents (which aim to develop relationships between them) and sessions with the parents ( in which topics of interest to parents are addressed, to provide them with the tools to support the personal and sports development of children and young people).

In case you are concerned about this essential aspect in the process of child development, we invite you to participate in the "Art of winning mentality training", the course for sports parents, organized by the Association for Sport Psychology, in Bucharest, Brasov and Cluj Napoca. For details and information, we invite you to access the link below:

www.psihologiasportului.ro/curs-parinti-sportivi-formare-mentalitate-invingator-2019

Sport psychologist Razvan Zaharia